The mythology of equality

Recently I had a conversation with a good friend about dating and something he said struck a chord with me.

“…I’m looking for my equal.”

At face value, you might think, “Aww that’s sweet!”. And isn’t that what we’re all looking for at the end of the day? Someone to love who loves us? Someone to share every happiness with, to be supportive through every sadness?


With so many shouting equality these days, it begs the question of “why?’ Why are we so bent on being equal? Why do you want to be equal – the same – as anybody else, much less everybody else? Somewhere along the line, someone sold us a story about equality. And it sounded good.

But why?

It sounded good because it meant the end to feeling unrecognized, overlooked, underrepresented, underpaid…All the negative feelings we tie from (allow) exterior influences onto our own internal self-worth. While I don’t argue that there are cases where the fight may not be the same for one individual vs. another, I feel that the end goal is often the same. To be the best.

Who cares about being equal? Don’t we really want to be the best?

In career. In family. In friends. In life. Being the best is ingrained from an early age – some might say, an inherent need inherited from our ancestors, when being the best meant survival.

Now circle up. Back to the beginning, I proudly admit that I went after and married my best. Not my equal. Not my “good enough”. My Best.

The man who challenged me, pushed me (sometimes kicking and screaming) beyond my comfort zone to achieve things I only allowed my soul to whisper, barely audible, deep-deep-deep down in my heart. The one who made my stomach flutter. The one with whom I could barely contain a smile from the pride felt when he was by my side. The one who taught me I needn’t try to contain it.

When that man walked into my life, I didn’t think I’d found my equal. I knew I’d found my better half. And that’s what we should all strive for – our Better Half. That is what Mastermind Alliances are forged from, allowing each of us to achieve and continue to build then conquer or biggest dreams in pursuit of our best lives.

That, My Dear,  is worth looking for.